I offer this as my personal opinion (I certainly cannot and would never claim to channel Spencer Kimball.) In a discussion about rape, the two lines most commonly cited from The Miracle of Forgiveness are on pages 63 and 196 (English edition). The problem is that for decades this counsel has been read by both men and women, by both actors and those acted upon.
preserve your virtue even if you lose your lives.” This appears, in the original and as used by SWK, to be addressed primarily to boys on college campuses, and in effect counsels: “don’t have sex, don’t initiate sex, don’t do it.” It is complicated by the fact that in common discourse of the time (1960s) men were seen as the actor and women the acted upon and “virtue” was for a woman to preserve.
Great advice for youth comes from the popular youth speaker, John Bytheway, in his book What I Wish I'd Known in High School, pp. My seminary teacher tried to explain that to a bunch of us sixteen-year-olds one day. "Guys and girls are different, and sometimes expressions of affection mean different things to different people. this means he likes me; he cares for me, oh, how sweet.'" ...
56-59, where he writes about the topic "What Do Kisses Mean? Maybe that's like saying, "I really like you." What if you kiss your date? Generally speaking, when a girl is being kissed, she may be thinking, 'Oh . "When a boy is kissing a girl, he may be thinking, 'Wow, this feels good. Can you see how easily a miscommunication or a misunderstanding can happen?
Kimball said: “Kissing has been prostituted and has degenerated to develop and express lust instead of affection, honor and admiration. What do kisses mean when handed out like pretzels and robbed of sacredness?
” If you're like me, your first response was probably, "Who goes around handing out pretzels? Which means that President Kimball was simply giving a much-needed reiteration of the Biblical ban on prostitution.
Long, passionate kissing definitely should be avoided.
Like Paul, I am pressed in the Spirit to warn and exhort and to strengthen.
May I have the blessings of our Heavenly Father in my utterances.
I realize that many of you are married; some are contemplating marriage and will likely be married in the next few years.
Once given or taken or stolen it can never be regained.
Even in a forced contact such as rape or incest, the injured one is greatly outraged.